All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).
rushmore01.wav(58K) rushmore01.mp3(58K) rushmore01.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Coach / Guest / Littlejeans: "I can't believe they let him build a campfire on stage. It's clearly a safety hazard...What did you think Mr. Littlejeans? / Best play ever, man."
rushmore02.wav(39K) rushmore02.mp3(39K) rushmore02.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "...I should be trying harder to score with chicks.."
rushmore03.wav(28K) rushmore03.mp3(28K) rushmore03.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Miss Cross: "...You and Herman deserve eachother. Your both little children."
rushmore04.wav(29K) rushmore04.mp3(29K) rushmore04.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "...Frank, you enter stage right with the bag of coccaine"
rushmore05.wav(67K) rushmore05.mp3(67K) rushmore05.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Magnus / Max: "Fischer, ya bleep! ...Not for long Kemo Sabe."
rushmore06.wav(37K) rushmore06.mp3(37K) rushmore06.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cross / Max: "What happened to your nose? / I got punched in the face. What's yoru excuse?"
rushmore07.wav(127K) rushmore07.mp3(127K) rushmore07.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Dirk / Blume: "I know about you and the teacher ...Your a married man, Blume ...With friends like you, who needs friends? (Spits.)"
rushmore08.wav(72K) rushmore08.mp3(72K) rushmore08.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Serpico / Max: "...Get off my back! / ...Don't bleep with my play!"
rushmore09.wav(85K) rushmore09.mp3(85K) rushmore09.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / Magnus: "...It was the hand job. And you wanna now something else? It was worth it."
rushmore10.wav(62K) rushmore10.mp3(62K) rushmore10.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cross / Max: "...My top schools were where I want to apply to are Oxford and the Sorbonne. My safety's Harvard."
rushmore11.wav(27K) rushmore11.mp3(27K) rushmore11.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Margaret / Max: "I loved it when you grabbed onto the bottom of the chopper as it was taking off. / That was totally improvised."
rushmore12.wav(24K) rushmore12.mp3(24K) rushmore12.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Magnus / Max: "Why don't you just piss off, Fischer? / ...Was that Latin?"
rushmore13.wav(113K) rushmore13.mp3(113K) rushmore13.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
George / Max: "...Tell that deformed Scottish gorilla to shut his fat face ...What are you, a lawyer?"
rushmore14.wav(89K) rushmore14.mp3(89K) rushmore14.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Dirk Calloway: "...I knew for sure when they went skinny-dipping in Mr. Blume's pool while giving eachother handjobs..."
rushmore15.wav(79K) rushmore15.mp3(79K) rushmore15.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Actor / Max: "...Nigga, you the crazy one. People be tryin' to kill you. Now you talkin' about gettin' rid a your gun?..."
rushmore16.wav(172K) rushmore16.mp3(172K) rushmore16.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "(Max goes to public school, and gives a speech.)"
rushmore17.wav(105K) rushmore17.mp3(105K) rushmore17.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Magnus / Max: "Fisher, ya spotty wee bleep-up. Got any good handjobs lately?..."
rushmore18.wav(35K) rushmore18.mp3(35K) rushmore18.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / Peter: "I like your nurse's uniform, guy. / These are O.R. scrubs. / Oh, are they?"
rushmore19.wav(57K) rushmore19.mp3(57K) rushmore19.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / The Yangs: "...A kid got his finger got blown off during rehearsals."
rushmore20.wav(113K) rushmore20.mp3(113K) rushmore20.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Dirk / Max: "...Well, tell that stupid Mick he just made my list of things to do today. I'm gonna pop a cap in his ass."
rushmore21.wav(121K) rushmore21.mp3(121K) rushmore21.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / Magnus: "I got a propasition for ya. / Well you can stick it up your mother's ass, ya little prick. ...I always wanted to be in one of your bleepin' plays..."
rushmore22.wav(48K) rushmore22.mp3(48K) rushmore22.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / Blume: "How in the hell did you ever get so rich? Your a quitter, man!..."
rushmore23.wav(197K) rushmore23.mp3(197K) rushmore23.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mr. Blume: "...Here's my advice to the rest of you: take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the cross hairs, and take them down."
rushmore24.wav(25K) rushmore24.mp3(25K) rushmore24.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Blume / Max: "She's my Rushmore, Max. / I know. She was mine too."
rushmore25.wav(39K) rushmore25.mp3(39K) rushmore25.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "Also, you'll find a pair of safety glasses, and ear plugs under your seats. Feel free to use them..."
rushmore26.wav(22K) rushmore26.mp3(22K) rushmore26.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "I saved Latin. What did you ever do?"
rushmore27.wav(96K) rushmore27.mp3(96K) rushmore27.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Blume / Max: "What's the secret, Max?..."
rushmore28.wav(41K) rushmore28.mp3(41K) rushmore28.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Blume / Guggenhiem: "...Sharp little guy. / He's one of the worst students we've got."
rushmore29.wav(89K) rushmore29.mp3(89K) rushmore29.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Guggenhiem / Max: "We're putting you on what we call Sudden Death Academic Probation. / ...Could I see some documentation on that?"
rushmore30.wav(130K) rushmore30.mp3(130K) rushmore30.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / Blume: "...That's all I meant by relationship. Want me to grab a dictionary?"
rushmore31.wav(37K) rushmore31.mp3(37K) rushmore31.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max / Blume: "...Were you in the bleep? / Yeah, I was in the bleep."
rushmore32.wav(11K) rushmore32.mp3(11K) rushmore32.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "War does funny things to men."
rushmore33.wav(78K) rushmore33.mp3(78K) rushmore33.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Max Fischer: "...I'll just be out back, getting handjobs from the woman you love."