All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).

104_afraiditdoes.wav(???K) 104_afraiditdoes.mp3(???K) 104_afraiditdoes.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "The school can't afford helmets for everybody..."

104_ahhcrap.wav(???K) 104_ahhcrap.mp3(???K) 104_ahhcrap.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Thatta boy Spark! Go get her.... ahwwww crap."

104_alumni.wav(???K) 104_alumni.mp3(???K) 104_alumni.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Elementary school alumni?"

104_aminus.wav(???K) 104_aminus.mp3(???K) 104_aminus.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Hey, wait a minute, why the hell does he get an A Minus?"

104_athelete.wav(???K) 104_athelete.mp3(???K) 104_athelete.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "We treat star athletes better because they're better people."

104_bigals.wav(???K) 104_bigals.mp3(???K) 104_bigals.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I'm sssuper, thankss for asssking."

104_boom.wav(???K) 104_boom.mp3(???K) 104_boom.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Boom! No more Middle Park players, hahaha!"

104_butchdog.wav(???K) 104_butchdog.mp3(???K) 104_butchdog.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I don't want a gay dog. I want a butch dog. I want a Rin-Tin-Tin."

104_candoit.wav(???K) 104_candoit.mp3(???K) 104_candoit.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "John Stamos's brother can do it."

104_carrotcake.wav(???K) 104_carrotcake.mp3(???K) 104_carrotcake.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Oh! My carrot cake!"

104_dance.wav(???K) 104_dance.mp3(???K) 104_dance.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Do you like to dance?"

104_dontbgay.wav(???K) 104_dontbgay.mp3(???K) 104_dontbgay.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Good boy. Now... don't be gay! Don't be gay, Spark."

104_garrisongay.wav(???K) 104_garrisongay.mp3(???K) 104_garrisongay.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "...evil right down to their cold black hearts, which not pump blood like yours and mine..."

104_gayanimals.wav(???K) 104_gayanimals.mp3(???K) 104_gayanimals.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Tell them that there are gay animals here that need homes.... desssperately."

104_gayestdog.wav(???K) 104_gayestdog.mp3(???K) 104_gayestdog.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "That is the gayest dog I have ever seen."

104_gaylion.wav(???K) 104_gaylion.mp3(???K) 104_gaylion.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Over here we have a gay lion..."

104_getbackthere.wav(???K) 104_getbackthere.mp3(???K) 104_getbackthere.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "That's right! You get back there!"

104_getchicks.wav(???K) 104_getchicks.mp3(???K) 104_getchicks.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I just act that way to get chicks, dumbass."

104_goodhetero.wav(???K) 104_goodhetero.mp3(???K) 104_goodhetero.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Now you go outside and practice football like a good little heterosexual."

104_hikeball.wav(???K) 104_hikeball.mp3(???K) 104_hikeball.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut ..."

104_holdball.wav(???K) 104_holdball.mp3(???K) 104_holdball.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "You've got to hold your football like your lover..."

104_homodog.wav(???K) 104_homodog.mp3(???K) 104_homodog.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "That dog is a gay homosexual."

104_hughgrant.wav(???K) 104_hughgrant.mp3(???K) 104_hughgrant.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I haven't seen an Englishman take a blow like that since Hugh Grant..."

104_jesus.wav(???K) 104_jesus.mp3(???K) 104_jesus.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Jesus, I haven't asked you for much..."

104_jesusyea.wav(???K) 104_jesusyea.mp3(???K) 104_jesusyea.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "...I am the way for you, my children. Let's open the phone lines back up for some questions."

104_jewishkid.wav(???K) 104_jewishkid.mp3(???K) 104_jewishkid.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Why the hell is that little Jewish kid playing quarterback?"

104_jewrun.wav(???K) 104_jewrun.mp3(???K) 104_jewrun.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I haven't seen a Jew run like that since..."

104_justshoes.wav(???K) 104_justshoes.mp3(???K) 104_justshoes.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "No, I didn't. That was just my shoes!"

104_kennydies.wav(???K) 104_kennydies.mp3(???K) 104_kennydies.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Yes, he's been decapitated!"

104_kickingass.wav(???K) 104_kickingass.mp3(???K) 104_kickingass.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Did you guys see me block that defense today? I was kicking ass!"

104_leather.wav(???K) 104_leather.mp3(???K) 104_leather.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Maybe he went shopping for some leather pants."

104_lovethatsong.wav(???K) 104_lovethatsong.mp3(???K) 104_lovethatsong.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I love that song..."

104_lovingyou.wav(???K) 104_lovingyou.mp3(???K) 104_lovingyou.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Its obvious where all the talent in that family went!"

104_malls.wav(???K) 104_malls.mp3(???K) 104_malls.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Did you check the shopping mall... - OW!"

104_martykickass.wav(???K) 104_martykickass.mp3(???K) 104_martykickass.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Marty's Movie Reviews are on? Kick ass!"

104_mkunotgay.wav(???K) 104_mkunotgay.mp3(???K) 104_mkunotgay.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "We can work on not making you gay together!"

104_molested.wav(???K) 104_molested.mp3(???K) 104_molested.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I haven't seen so many children molested since..."

104_ok2bgay.wav(???K) 104_ok2bgay.mp3(???K) 104_ok2bgay.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "And maybe we can beat them by more next year... and its ok to be gay."

104_oolala.wav(???K) 104_oolala.mp3(???K) 104_oolala.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "No pink bandana, Sparky. Bad dog!"

104_oppressors.wav(???K) 104_oppressors.mp3(???K) 104_oppressors.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Chrisitans and Republicans and Nazis, oh my!"

104_poundass.wav(???K) 104_poundass.mp3(???K) 104_poundass.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Speaking of pounding ass, here comes Stan's little homo dog!"

104_propaganda.wav(???K) 104_propaganda.mp3(???K) 104_propaganda.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Oh stop filling his head with that queer loving propoganda."

104_puppet.wav(???K) 104_puppet.mp3(???K) 104_puppet.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Stupid puppet."

104_rex.wav(???K) 104_rex.mp3(???K) 104_rex.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Stan forgot to mention that his dog is a gay homosexual."

104_robert.wav(???K) 104_robert.mp3(???K) 104_robert.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I just wanted to thank you for the advice, and for dying for my sins, that was really nice of you."

104_rodney.wav(???K) 104_rodney.mp3(???K) 104_rodney.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I haven't seen a beating like that since Rodney King..."

104_sanctuary.wav(???K) 104_sanctuary.mp3(???K) 104_sanctuary.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "We're all big gay friends here. Would you like to live with us?"

104_sillybuns.wav(???K) 104_sillybuns.mp3(???K) 104_sillybuns.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Of course they are sillybuns!"

104_simon.wav(???K) 104_simon.mp3(???K) 104_simon.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "...so you see, Simon and Simon were not brothers in real life, only on television."

104_simonlong.wav(???K) 104_simonlong.mp3(???K) 104_simonlong.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "... the assignment was on Asian Cultures. You get a D Minus."

104_singalong.wav(???K) 104_singalong.mp3(???K) 104_singalong.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Loving you is easy because you're beautiful... du di doo doo!"

104_smallworld.wav(???K) 104_smallworld.mp3(???K) 104_smallworld.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "We're not sad anymore because we're out the closet door!"

104_sodomies.wav(???K) 104_sodomies.mp3(???K) 104_sodomies.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "No way, dude. My mom says god hates gay people. Thats why he... smoked the sodomies in France."

104_something.wav(???K) 104_something.mp3(???K) 104_something.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "He doing something to his ass. He's not kicking it, but he's definitely doing somethinng to his ass."

104_stanjesus.wav(???K) 104_stanjesus.mp3(???K) 104_stanjesus.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "My son, alot of people have wondered what my stance on homosexuality is..."

104_stillgay.wav(???K) 104_stillgay.mp3(???K) 104_stillgay.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "He still looks pretty gay to me."

104_super.wav(???K) 104_super.mp3(???K) 104_super.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I'm sssuper. Thankss for assking!"

104_super2.wav(???K) 104_super2.mp3(???K) 104_super2.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "I'm sssuper. Thankss for assking! (Different from above)"

104_thatgood.wav(???K) 104_thatgood.mp3(???K) 104_thatgood.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "Are you sure Stan is that good?"

104_whatthehell.wav(???K) 104_whatthehell.mp3(???K) 104_whatthehell.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "What the hell is he talking about?"

104_worriedman.wav(???K) 104_worriedman.mp3(???K) 104_worriedman.m4r(iPhone ringtone)

: "You need to lay off the cough syrup. Alright? Seriously, I'm worried about you man."