Episode 316 Are You There God Its Me Jesus price at: amazon
All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).
316_agenda.wav(27K) 316_agenda.mp3(27K) 316_agenda.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We're going to talk about our periods, and boys, lets talk about boys first."
316_auldlangsyne.wav(79K) 316_auldlangsyne.mp3(79K) 316_auldlangsyne.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "A rather pukish rendition of Auld Lang Syne."
316_bitnervous.wav(25K) 316_bitnervous.mp3(25K) 316_bitnervous.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "It looks like the little fellah is a bit nervous..."
316_boys.wav(44K) 316_boys.mp3(44K) 316_boys.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I think Craig is pretty cool, but I don't think Clyde is very cool."
316_canihelpyou.wav(113K) 316_canihelpyou.mp3(113K) 316_canihelpyou.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Um, its the millennium, Jesus."
316_cantbelast.wav(38K) 316_cantbelast.mp3(38K) 316_cantbelast.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "All the gusy are getting they're periods, and I don't think I am!"
316_cartm...wav(54K) 316_cartm...mp3(54K) 316_cartm...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Well its when puberty hits and you bleed, you know, down there..."
316_coolplace.wav(14K) 316_coolplace.mp3(14K) 316_coolplace.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Hey, Las Vegas is a pretty cool place for us mature people."
316_cracker.wav(11K) 316_cracker.mp3(11K) 316_cracker.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "What's the matter, little cracker?"
316_dontfeelbad.wav(16K) 316_dontfeelbad.mp3(16K) 316_dontfeelbad.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Hey, don't feel bad Stan, some of us just mature a little later then others."
316_every...wav(36K) 316_every...mp3(36K) 316_every...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I'm not even supposed to have my period!"
316_fatass.wav(30K) 316_fatass.mp3(30K) 316_fatass.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "What, fatass?"
316_father.wav(170K) 316_father.mp3(170K) 316_father.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Father, I need to talk to you."
316_first...wav(28K) 316_first...mp3(28K) 316_first...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Now, for our first club activity."
316_gayes...wav(49K) 316_gayes...mp3(49K) 316_gayes...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I'm here live in Las Vegas in what is quickly becoming known as the gayest party ever."
316_gentlearms.wav(57K) 316_gentlearms.mp3(57K) 316_gentlearms.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "And he lifts me up with his gentle arms..."
316_goodj...wav(43K) 316_goodj...mp3(43K) 316_goodj...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I was overcome with my new popularity and I let pride get in the way of good judgement."
316_goodmorning.wav(37K) 316_goodmorning.mp3(37K) 316_goodmorning.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Good morning, South Park!"
316_great...wav(32K) 316_great...mp3(32K) 316_great...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Hey, Rod, great to see you!"
316_hatesme.wav(45K) 316_hatesme.mp3(45K) 316_hatesme.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Jesus, why does God hate me?"
316_hellostan.wav(39K) 316_hellostan.mp3(39K) 316_hellostan.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Oh, hello Stan!"
316_hereheis.wav(165K) 316_hereheis.mp3(165K) 316_hereheis.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Ladies and Gentleman, here he is, as promised, Mr. Rod "Do you Think I'm Sexy" Stewart!"
316_hesneat.wav(30K) 316_hesneat.mp3(30K) 316_hesneat.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "He's neat, mommy."
316_hormones.wav(71K) 316_hormones.mp3(71K) 316_hormones.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who never went through puberty?"
316_ihave...wav(88K) 316_ihave...mp3(88K) 316_ihave...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "How come I haven't gotten my period yet?"
316_ike.wav(12K) 316_ike.mp3(12K) 316_ike.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Ike, can I talk to you?"
316_ikeadvice.wav(134K) 316_ikeadvice.mp3(134K) 316_ikeadvice.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Ike, I don't know what to do..."
316_invegas.wav(23K) 316_invegas.mp3(23K) 316_invegas.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I've got to catch a plane to Las Vegas to see the Rod Stewart Millennium Show."
316_ivegotboobs.wav(16K) 316_ivegotboobs.mp3(16K) 316_ivegotboobs.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Whoa dude, I've got boobs!"
316_jesusletter.wav(81K) 316_jesusletter.mp3(81K) 316_jesusletter.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Are you there God, its me, Jesus..."
316_jumpi...wav(39K) 316_jumpi...mp3(39K) 316_jumpi...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I can just say I got my period!"
316_justfourdays.wav(84K) 316_justfourdays.mp3(84K) 316_justfourdays.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "All over the world people are starting to celebrate by dancing and singing and killing one another."
316_kennysperiod.wav(31K) 316_kennysperiod.mp3(31K) 316_kennysperiod.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Kenny gets his period."
316_knewyoucould.wav(24K) 316_knewyoucould.mp3(24K) 316_knewyoucould.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We knew you could do it, Jesus!"
316_leftout.wav(46K) 316_leftout.mp3(46K) 316_leftout.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I might not even get to be their friend anymore."
316_littleboy.wav(46K) 316_littleboy.mp3(46K) 316_littleboy.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Oh look, its that little boy who hasn't gotten his period yet!"
316_littleolder.wav(54K) 316_littleolder.mp3(54K) 316_littleolder.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "He's gotten a little older but you're gonna see how much he can still rock."
316_livei...wav(121K) 316_livei...mp3(121K) 316_livei...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Jesus bleep, our Lord and Savior, is presenting Rod Stewart, the undisputed King of Pop, right here at this hotel behind me."
316_localnews.wav(52K) 316_localnews.mp3(52K) 316_localnews.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "In local news, a stomach virus is going around that is causing bleeding of the colon in some small children."
316_lookstan.wav(15K) 316_lookstan.mp3(15K) 316_lookstan.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Look, Stan, do you really know what a period is?"
316_lovehelping.wav(8K) 316_lovehelping.mp3(8K) 316_lovehelping.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I just love helping people."
316_makeusone.wav(48K) 316_makeusone.mp3(48K) 316_makeusone.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Yes, puberty is a very wonderful thing, Stan."
316_mature.wav(49K) 316_mature.mp3(49K) 316_mature.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I got my period and you guys didn't!"
316_maturenow.wav(24K) 316_maturenow.mp3(24K) 316_maturenow.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Look, Kenny and I are mature now."
316_menst...wav(175K) 316_menst...mp3(175K) 316_menst...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Stan, let me sing you a little song about the menstrual cycle."
316_mypleasure.wav(46K) 316_mypleasure.mp3(46K) 316_mypleasure.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Tell your father to take just one of these pills every week."
316_nicetitties.wav(47K) 316_nicetitties.mp3(47K) 316_nicetitties.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Wow Stan, you really got some nice titties there."
316_nopoint.wav(57K) 316_nopoint.mp3(57K) 316_nopoint.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "If God answered all our prayers, there'd be nothing left for us to do ourselves."
316_notfair.wav(61K) 316_notfair.mp3(61K) 316_notfair.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "And then the next day you're at the bottom again because everyone has blood come out of there ass...."
316_nothi...wav(54K) 316_nothi...mp3(54K) 316_nothi...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I'm sorry, there was nothing we could do."
316_onequestion.wav(70K) 316_onequestion.mp3(70K) 316_onequestion.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Since it is the end of the first 2000 years, I will allow you, my children, to ask me one quesiton."
316_pardonthepun.wav(50K) 316_pardonthepun.mp3(50K) 316_pardonthepun.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Perhaps the children are all shoving tampons up their ass because they've seen the Backstreet Boys doing it on TV or something."
316_period.wav(38K) 316_period.mp3(38K) 316_period.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Well, because yesterday, I got my period."
316_perioded.wav(77K) 316_perioded.mp3(77K) 316_perioded.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "You guys, I got my period too!"
316_pooped.wav(67K) 316_pooped.mp3(67K) 316_pooped.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "You pooped your pants?"
316_reallybusy.wav(46K) 316_reallybusy.mp3(46K) 316_reallybusy.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Are you there God, its me, Stan."
316_reconsider.wav(36K) 316_reconsider.mp3(36K) 316_reconsider.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Father, will you please reconsider and show up tomorrow?"
316_rewarded.wav(76K) 316_rewarded.mp3(76K) 316_rewarded.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "And ye who believe in me shall be rewarded!"
316_riot.wav(64K) 316_riot.mp3(64K) 316_riot.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "The riot."
316_rockt...wav(45K) 316_rockt...mp3(45K) 316_rockt...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Alright people, are we ready to rock the Millennium?"
316_rollcall.wav(44K) 316_rollcall.mp3(44K) 316_rollcall.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Is everyone accounted for?"
316_seasoned.wav(27K) 316_seasoned.mp3(27K) 316_seasoned.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Rod is a seasoned veteran so going to have to ask for a bit more cash."
316_shoul...wav(24K) 316_shoul...mp3(24K) 316_shoul...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Dude, I don't think 8 year olds are supposed to take hormones."
316_somethingbig.wav(41K) 316_somethingbig.mp3(41K) 316_somethingbig.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "After reviewing the Bible, it does say that something big is going to happen at the Millennium."
316_somethingnew.wav(101K) 316_somethingnew.mp3(101K) 316_somethingnew.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We want to see God!"
316_soontoo.wav(22K) 316_soontoo.mp3(22K) 316_soontoo.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Dude, Cartman can't hit puberty before us!"
316_spirituality.wav(25K) 316_spirituality.mp3(25K) 316_spirituality.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Ok, today's word is spirituality..."
316_stansletter.wav(41K) 316_stansletter.mp3(41K) 316_stansletter.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Stan's letter to God."
316_startitup.wav(32K) 316_startitup.mp3(32K) 316_startitup.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We've got about 4 hours to the New Year and so I think its time to start it up!"
316_start...wav(51K) 316_start...mp3(51K) 316_start...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Dude, did you get your period yet?"
316_suppo...wav(68K) 316_suppo...mp3(68K) 316_suppo...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Meanwhile, more and more people are showing up to show their support for Jesus."
316_sureglad.wav(37K) 316_sureglad.mp3(37K) 316_sureglad.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "The folks are sure glad you're playing."
316_swimmingly.wav(78K) 316_swimmingly.mp3(78K) 316_swimmingly.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Now lets talk about our periods."
316_tampons.wav(34K) 316_tampons.mp3(34K) 316_tampons.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Did you get your Maxi Pads, Kenny?"
316_terrible.wav(49K) 316_terrible.mp3(49K) 316_terrible.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I'm not bleeding outta my ass!!!"
316_thankstom.wav(91K) 316_thankstom.mp3(91K) 316_thankstom.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "If Jesus comes out of his house and is not scared by his shadow it means the next 1000 years will be full of peace and love."
316_thatd...wav(41K) 316_thatd...mp3(41K) 316_thatd...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Hey wait, that doesn't count as our question does it?"
316_thatsgod.wav(42K) 316_thatsgod.mp3(42K) 316_thatsgod.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "That's God?"
316_thegoddess.wav(61K) 316_thegoddess.mp3(61K) 316_thegoddess.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I believe that the Goddess in me is my spirituality."
316_thisfriend.wav(57K) 316_thisfriend.mp3(57K) 316_thisfriend.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I have, this friend, see..."
316_timetoleave.wav(24K) 316_timetoleave.mp3(24K) 316_timetoleave.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Stanly, wake up honey, its time to leave for Las Vegas!"
316_wewantgod.wav(94K) 316_wewantgod.mp3(94K) 316_wewantgod.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We want God! We want God!"
316_whatd...wav(53K) 316_whatd...mp3(53K) 316_whatd...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "What did you expect me to look like, my son?"
316_whatd...wav(48K) 316_whatd...mp3(48K) 316_whatd...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Well, God can't just answer every prayer."
316_whatk...wav(54K) 316_whatk...mp3(54K) 316_whatk...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "What happened, what killed him, doctor?"
316_whaty...wav(28K) 316_whaty...mp3(28K) 316_whaty...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "So, what your saying is this person shouldn't be bummed because everybody has their period at a different time."
316_wings.wav(65K) 316_wings.mp3(65K) 316_wings.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Ooh, this one's got wings, you guys!"
316_woohoo.wav(71K) 316_woohoo.mp3(71K) 316_woohoo.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "You got your period too, Kenny?"
316_youareaman.wav(39K) 316_youareaman.mp3(39K) 316_youareaman.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "You will hit puberty when the time is right, but you will never have a period because you are a man, with titties."
316_youcame.wav(57K) 316_youcame.mp3(57K) 316_youcame.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Father, you came!"
316_youngerkids.wav(36K) 316_youngerkids.mp3(36K) 316_youngerkids.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Well, we're going with our families to Las Vegas."
316_yourwhat.wav(40K) 316_yourwhat.mp3(40K) 316_yourwhat.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "You got your what?"